Do you ever start out your morning by saying, “Rob you’re a genius!”
That is how I began my morning today. It is rare that I start the day this way but friends I was feeling incredibly inventive.
I have been really busy lately because of work and I am also in a play at night so finding time to eat has been a bit of a problem.
So this morning I woke up early and said I am going to make some hard boiled eggs so that I can just pop them in my mouth while I am on the go. It is good protein and I can gag them down with water.
Let me pause here to say I don’t love eggs. I eat them for the protein but I usually have to plug my nose and shimmy them down. Sometimes eggs trigger my gag reflex which is really embarrassing for how many times I have ordered eggs on a date.
I was running low on time so I thought why not just boil them in the microwave? Again, Rob Abney you are genius.
So after about, oh, I don’t know, eight minutes basking in my own greatness, the explosions started.
I am not talking about little “booms” here friends; I am talking about full on “someone is throwing grenades into my house” type of explosions.
So needless to say after a half an hour of using a sand shovel to dig yoke out of my microwave I feel sufficiently humbled.
Apparently I missed the day in Home Economics when we covered such topics as “Boiling an Egg: Doing It in the Microwave Could In Fact Kill You”.
The worse part of this whole thing is that now my entire house smells like egg poop. I was dry heaving all morning.
Technology: She is a bitter mistress.