So I went to my first caucus meeting last week.
Let me pause here to say, that if we are trying to get younger voters involved in the political process perhaps we need to change the name. "Caucus" sounds like something you get after you have had a bad Indian meal. Why not call it "Political Dance Party 2014" or "Vote 'til you Die, Sucka'". This, I feel, will bring out the young voters.
So I show up to the caucus meeting not even sure what I am supposed do. I enter a classroom with a bunch of people who seem super pumped about the republican party. There was even a guy with the constitution printed on his t-shirt, wearing a lovely red, white, and blue fanny pack, which, if we are being honest, was concealing his 9 mm handgun.
So I made my way to the back and thought to myself, "I think I am just going to watch to see how this process works." And then I hid behind the man with "constitution T-shirt."
So after a prayer, yes, a prayer, Oh, and the pledge of allegiance, which I haven't done since I was 10. We took our seats. That's when the nominations began...
So the next thing that happened is that they started nominating people to be their delegate reps.
So I am sitting there thinking, "Well this will be interesting. No one knows who I am so I am safe...did they just say my name?"
They sure did call my name friends.
My sweet neighbor nominated me...I wanted to kill her.
But I said I would accept the nomination, because I believe we should all take part in the political process, and I knew there was no way anyone would actually vote for me.
So then they asked us all to come up and tell a little about ourselves.
They asked me to start off. I didn't know what to say, but I remembered what people did on the Miss America Pageant when they introduced themselves to the judges and thought it might be effective.
"Hello friends! My name is Robierto, and I hail from the great state of Utah, and live in the beautiful city of South Jordan. I am in my fourth year as a freshman at the University of Utah, studying plant life. I enjoying hiking, racquetball, and spending time with my 12 cats. So let's hear it for me!"
Then some super political lady in the front row said, "That doesn't tell us anything about your political views." It wasn't so much what she said but how she said it that bugged me. She was kind of snotty with me.
So I launched into, "My political views? Um, well, I don't believe we should nominate friends who are ill prepared to give a political speech. I don't know how I feel about starting a political meeting with a prayer, AND, I don't appreciate you bullying people the first time they attend one of your little "Caa-Caa" meetings. So chill out, sister!"
Um, after that I was pretty sure I was not going to be elected. In fact I almost just left because I felt so stupid.
But guess who will be representing his area as a county delegate?
I won because there were only 12 of us at the meeting and there were 12 positions to fill.
Good bless America!
This political system of ours, is working great!