The Days and Nights of Robierto

I try not to let things bother me, I know I should just let things roll off my back. But sometimes people do things that seem so out of context and rude that it really bothers me. Case and point, after an exhausting week where I was not feeling well, sleeping maybe six hours a night and then performing in a play throughout the week, I wasn’t in top form when I arrived at church yesterday. I taught my Gospel Doctrine Lesson and felt really blessed it went as well as it did, in spite of how exhausted and sick I felt. Admittedly, I ran a few minutes over, and I was trying to clear out of the Relief Society room as fast as I could and talk to a man who had some questions about what we had discussed in my lesson. When all of a sudden, something happened that changed me in a deep and a profound way for the rest of the day. A hasty sister interrupted my conversion with this elderly man and said sarcastically, “ Yeah...nice lesson. Seriously, we need to set up for Relief Society (with her voi...

Friends, you know I would rather step on my lips then to criticize others, but sometimes there comes an advertisement that begs to be critiqued. That advertisment is the new Snuggie Commercial. As you watch the attached video, here are some awesome things to look for: 1-The "Macarena" in a Snuggie. Really friends? 2-Friends is it normal for a couple to hula-hoop and juggle in the bedroom? If so, you need to see a marriage counselor, ASAP. 3-Watch the couple spooning on the couch. The guy catches a piece of popcorn in his mouth and then gets all up in his wife's face about it. In real life wouldn't you just smack him? 4-I love that his wife does the "rapid gunfighter" move with her fingers when she wins her husband at...that's right...Jenga. You gots some made skills, sister ! 5- And last but definitely not least, is the man " raising the roo f " at the tail end of the commercial. First off, are we really still doing that? That was s...

Sometimes I like to take my chances at the portable taco stand down the street. There is so much risk involved every time I eat there, it gives me a little thrill. I have a 50% chance that I am going to have a fine dining experience in an open air dining facility, and have one of the best tacos I have ever had. Conversely, I have a 50% chance that I will have a fine dining experience, followed by severe intestinal pain cause by rotten cheese or salmonella. Ahhh, good times. I kid about food poisoning…but I uh…I do have it. I LOVE EATING AT THE TACO STAND! …well I don’t love it…but I uh…I do, do it.

Friends, with the passing of Halloween, and some serious reflection on how it went this year, I have some feelings I would like to share. I have never been a huge fan of Halloween because…well to be honest it freaks me out a little bit.  I don’t know if I am overly sensitive, but to be honest, Michael Jackson’s thriller still terrifies me. Here are some items that have also terrified me this Halloween season:   The Complete Lack of Clothing I don’t know what happens to people in the fall, but for whatever reason, otherwise sane people just go nutty about being scantily clad on Halloween. If you want to want to wear these items around your house, good on ya’, I can support that. But don’t bring yourself into my office dressed like that.  And if you have to give a presentation at work on Halloween, maybe dressing up as Michael Phelps in only a  Speedo or as Little Bo Peep Show really isn't the best wardrobe option for ya'. It makes us all feel uncomfortabl...

It's October 28th or as my co-workers call it " Bring Your Slanket To Work " Day. I hope they weren't kidding or I could look pretty foolish today.

Is it possible that “ Dickys ” aren’t as popular as I think they are? My co-worker came into my office today and said, “ You look nice in your turtleneck/Halloween sweater combination ." Whereupon I told her, “ First of all, stop hitting on me. And secondly, it is still too warm to wear both a turtle neck and sweater. So I am wearing a “ Dicky ” in lieu of a turtleneck. ” To which she asked, “ What is a “ Dicky? ” And I was all, like, “ Really? Only the greatest invention of our time! ” So for those who have been living under a rock the past, oh I don’t know, like 20 years. A “ Dicky ” or, “ Dickay ” as they say it in France, is a shirt with no sleeves or a body, just a collar, or a neck…if we are talking along the lines of turtle necks. All you ladies who are looking for a great gift for you husband, lover, or significant other…the “Dicky” is the answer for you! They are cheap, look good in summer or winter. And because they come in a wide variety of colors they make a lovely ...

Do you know what is hard? Finding some pants at Costco that could potentially be the pants that will look so good that you will get that promotion, find a girlfriend, and get a photo spread on INtouch magazines “Who Wore it Best? page” But really, you can only get a general idea of how they fit by holding them up and trying them on over your Levis. If Costco is going to sell clothes shouldn’t they also provide us place where we can try on said clothes? Why aren’t there dressing rooms in Costco, friends? What? Do they anticipate that we are all wearing Lycra Spandex as we are shopping and can just slide pants on and off? First, of all I don’t think that Lycra Spandex is   a good look for anyone. And secondly, as I painfully found out last winter, once it gets cold in Utah, Lycra Spandex, is not very practical.   I guess you could pile up some bulk sized cereal boxes and make a little wall of privacy for yourself, and then hold up a gynormous frying pan to see how they fit. ...