The Shopping Crash

Do you ever start your day off feeling great about life and the world around you, and then go to Wal-mart and within 20 minutes of shopping you become so impatient with people that you want to burn shopping carts and throw cheese samples at everyone?

It’s seems that every time I go to Wal-mart people seem to lose all sense of balance and direction. I don’t know if some how there is some weird magnetic phenomena that makes my fellow shoppers lose all sense of their depth perception, you know kind of like the Bermuda Triangle affect, but people seem to be bumping into me and other stationary objects at a rate that seems why beyond the normal average for this part of the country.

When I asked my sister if she had a similar problem at her neighborhood Wal-mart she said she did and felt is was because, and I quote, “The devil resides in Wal-mart, that is why we all feel like crap when we leave”. After my experience last night I am beginning to believe that she is right.

Last night as I was shopping in the cereal aisle perusing which cereal to buy to fulfill both my breakfast and dinner needs for the following day, out of the corner of my eye I see a women making a B-line for me and my cart.

Now, I don’t profess to know the intricacies of the “right of way” system when one is pushing a shopping cart but, it seems to me that if you are stopped in the aisle the other person who is moving should be the one to divert their course. Am I right?

So I try to make eye contact with this diverted shopper so she knows that I know that I see her, and that I am not moving. But she continues right toward me and eventually runs right into me. Now sure she was going at a relatively low speed and I didn’t receive any injuries, but just the fact that it had to happen really annoyed me.

So after I left the cereal aisle I was heading to the milk section at a very nice clip when some crazy person comes pulling out of the baking aisle without looking both ways before heading out into the intersection of the aisles of Baking and Milk. And I slammed right into her, again at a very low speed, but what if I would have had some eggs or a crystal goblet pyramid in my cart? What then friends? What then?

Something needs to be done. Perhaps stop lights at the end of aisles, or Wal-mart employees on Segways who can monitor out of control cart pushers. But ultimately it comes down to Wal-mart shoppers getting their head in the game and looking out for others, right?

Seriously as long as their prices are the lowest we all have to shop there, so let’s try to look out for each other and be safe.