The Prune

Do you ever start liking a food all of a sudden that you didn’t like at all before? One word for you friends: Prunes. They are delicious!

Ya know, I always considered Prunes to be an “old person” food, but friends make no mistake, Prunes are youthful, hip and oh so cool, let’s not make any bones about it. You know how important it is for me to only eat cool food.

One thing that I learned is that the Prune needs to be respected. You walk a fine line of intestinal regularity with the Prune. Oh sure they are tasty in moderation but take one too many and wow, you are asking for trouble.

Like last night when I thought I would make a Prune smoothy. “I love smoothies and I love prunes, what a beautiful marriage of flavors and tastes that will be”, I thought naively.

Within about an hour I realized that I had crossed the line of “Prune safety” by putting five in my blender. Quickly, I was moved upon to be stay in for the night.

For those of you who are new to the “Prune game” let me teach a little something, when you eat five prunes you have pretty much walked into the fruit demilitarized zone without a bullet proof vest on. You might as well say, “I love bowel pain and I am ready to ride the slippery slope which will become my bowel movements for the next day or so. Let me have it.” And the prunes will gladly oblige you.

It felt like I was being ravaged from the insight out. And that I was filling up with air, I think the technical term is called “bloating”, that’s right friends bloating.

I don’t want to get into too much detail of the rest of the story because you can figure it out for yourselves. But let me say, 4 prunes = good, 5 prunes = loose bowels…um…very, very loose.

Be careful out there friends. Be so careful with those prunes. It is a love/hate relationship that requires restraint Always restraint. (This has the potential to be a great chastity-type analogy for your young people. Your welcome friends.)

Comments

Erin said…
Prunes in moderation, that's what I say. But yes, I agree. Prunes are delicious! You be careful with your prunes, Robbie.
Kimi D said…
TMI!
(my word verification is "shacter"...that seems oddly ironic)
Did you not learn ANYTHING from the peach fiasco?! Apparently some people just shouldn't have open liberties with produce!
Rachael said…
Rob, Rob, Rob, ya goof. Do you do these things on purpose?
Carrot Jello said…
"Within about an hour I realized that I had crossed the line of “Prune safety” by putting five in my blender."
Okay, THAT made me r.o.f.l.
but like sitting up.

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